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Leaks Show Putin Is A Penny Bingo Player
2011-01-25 09:40:00 | Written by: Tami Bayliss
Word has been percolating around the bingo chats that one of your roomies might be a (quasi) world leader. A player going by the name "VladPutFTW" has been seen in several rooms - most commonly in the larger penny bingo games. The suspicions of many were confirmed by cables obtained by Bingo-Wikileaks which paint a gripping story combining international intrigue with guaranteed jackpot penny bingo games. After thorough analysis, we are now able to put a timeline on these chain of events.
It all started in the Fall of 2008 subsequent to Putin's triumphant march into Georgia. Feeling highly confident, the Russian strongman then decided to see if he could conquer an even larger objective - a promotional game giving away a trip for 2 to Mallorca. The cold Russian Winter was approaching, and the thought of a pleasant getaway was quite appealing - so he bought the maximum allowed number of £2 tickets. This bold move was true to his nature, but not understanding the complexities of 90-ball bingo he made several tactical mistakes which would lead to his eventual undoing.
Cables show that Putin was dismayed to see that none of his tickets won, and his subsequent loss of confidence was evidently of major concern to high level Russian officials. Not even getting the one line consolation prize added salt to Putin's wounded pride. One cable illustrates how an unnamed ranking military officer blurted out at a staff meeting - "What kind of alleged dictator gets his butt whooped by a bunch of British girls?"
The current reports of Putin's reappearance in the chats sheds light on Russia's geopolitical situation. Seeing he is limiting himself to penny and free bingo games, analysts don't predict any imminent bold moves within the Eastern European sphere. However, MI5 is said to have intelligence that Putin has set his eyes on one of the £50 Sweaty Betty Vouchers up for grabs now at Wink Bingo - analysts are watching closely whether VladPutFTW now has the confidence to attack this higher stakes game.Related News
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